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Everything Always

Jun 24, 2021

Your family needs you at your best, but when conflict creeps in between your partner and their ex, it has a tendency to wind you up tight and cause all kinds of frustration and anxiety. So how can this be avoided? And how do you, as a step-parent, know where to draw the line when it comes to your involvement? In this episode, I will be talking about what you can do in these situations, what we have done, and what step-parents are not responsible for doing.

This is a one-on-one session, just me and you, where you’ll get a better understanding of what you can control, what you can’t control, and how to show up for yourself and others in the best way. My ultimate goal is to let you know that you’re not alone and that you shouldn’t be full of guilt and anxiety over these situations. After this episode, you will be able to breathe a little easier and have more clarity on what you can and cannot do as a step-parent.

2:20 – 4:22 – A thank-you from me to you.

4:23 – 5:57 – Why I’m talking about step-parent issues

5:58 – 10:45 – The disruption that conflict has on you and your family.

10:46 – 14:04 – What you can’t control.

14:05 – 21:17 – What you can do.

21:18 – 25:55 – The most important influence you have.

25:56 – 28:29  – How to bring positivity and perspective.

28:30 – 38:05 – The opportunity that comes with hard times.



  • How you are brought down, even by things that have nothing to do with you.
  • Why you can’t change another person’s behavior.
  • Why focusing on you will help you show up better for others.
  • How to contribute to the situation without going too far.
  • Why you should embrace challenges and treat them as opportunities for unity.



“If you are the step-parent and your partner is going through an icky, terrible mess, even if you think it is about you, it really isn’t.” - Summer

“You’re probably putting an overwhelming amount of pressure on yourself thinking that somehow you can control all of these outcomes, but all of these outcomes have little to do with you.” - Summer

“Be that sounding board for the anger or venting without inserting your judgment unless asked—and sometimes not even then!” - Summer

3 Interesting Clips:

5:05 – 5:29 – An important reminder about being a step-parent.

11:44 – 12:24 – Your role in changing other people’s behavior.

14:35 – 15:12 – The importance of a clear head.



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